Joy Unspeakable

Yesterday I arrived back in Toronto, coming from the place I had called home for ten days - M'Chigeeng. During the ride back, I sat in the car thinking about all the happy moments, reliving all the memories that were fresh in my mind, and I smiled. I smiled because I remembered the joy, the joy that I got to share with the people that I met in the community during the week. 

I pulled out my journal, and these two words came to mind 'joy unspeakable'. I knew those words from a song: Thrive by Casting Crowns which says "Joy unspeakable, faith unsinkable, love unstoppable, anything is possible".

I knew that this song represented how I had felt up at M'Chigeeng. My joy had been unspeakable, my faith had been unsinkable, my love unstoppable, and I was reminded that anything is possible! The kind of joy experienced in the love of Jesus is unexplainable, the faith that God has taught me can never be weakened, and the love of Jesus will never end. God reminded me once again that anything is possible.

These ten days of my summer are always the best - I always say Day Star is the best part of my summer, and it really is! What made this year so great was a couple of things:

1. Jesus - he helped me to love more, and he made everything so amazing

2. Seeing the smiling faces of the children every day - I know I am making a difference by being a good role model and a good leader

3. For the chance to share with people the difference Jesus has made in my life - that he has surely given me a hope and a future

4. To be able to share with people how much Jesus loves them, and that nothing they do will stop him from loving them

5. I got to talk of my struggles, that I'm not perfect but God loves me enough to give me every chance in the world

It's hard to explain the joy that Jesus brings into my life, but I know I can share that joy with the people on M'Chigeeng, and that brings me joy. I rejoice in the the joy of others, knowing that God has given me the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of kids through Day Star Day Camp. I know that God doesn't want me to stop loving the beautiful people of M'Chigeeng and there's no way I can stop loving them now. A little piece of my heart is left in M'Chigeeng, and until I can return I will pray for everyone there. I ask Jesus to teach me to love through prayer when I cannot possibly be there to love in person. The love of God is so far and so wide, and I know my prayers will be heard by God. God doesn't forget to love anyone, but sometimes people do need to be told how much he really does love them - and telling people that brings me joy!

God bless! :)


song reference: Thrive - Casting Crowns https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQ71RWJhS_M  

Fasting Before the Struggle Gets Hard

Esther 4:16 "Go, gather all the Jews to be found in Susa, and hold a fast on my behalf, and do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my young women will also fast as you do. Then I will go to the king, though it is against the law, and if I perish, I perish."

This verse particularly spoke to me as I began to read through Esther a day or so ago. I'm working pretty hard now, getting tired, and soon I'll be away for 10 days serving God. It's pretty tiring between the stuff I've got to do for work, and the stuff I'm doing to prepare for the upcoming 10 days. I've got to admit, I have been struggling. Then recently I've had some disagreements with some people around me, people have been causing issues and its getting to me. But I've found comfort in reading Esther. 

Esther was a woman who was made Queen with a purpose, a purpose mandated by God. I know God has a plan for me, I know I'm going to be stretched more than I can bear, but with God, he'll get me through it. Reading Esther is teaching me to rely on God, that I should look to him before I make any decisions, but that before I do anything I should pray and fast, just as Esther did. So yes, I'm fasting and praying, and I've asked my parents to join me. 

Esther did what was right in God's eyes. And I am trying to do the same, I want my life to glorify him, and that includes my decisions even though things can be frustrating. Life may not be easy, and people will push your buttons, some people will even purposely try to start conflict to see how you'll react. Fasting is reminding me that I need to pray more often. I cannot serve God as a weak body, but I can serve him as a strong body. A body that has been faithful in action, and prayerful in thought. I am looking for God's guidance, and I know that if I ask him, and obey what he says, he will be faithful.

God bless! 

Body Image; the Image of God

Body image is a touchy subject for most girls, and even some guys. Its something that many of us struggle with at some point in our lives. It doesn't matter what size you are, the fact is that we see perfection in the media and we fool ourselves into thinking that beauty can be defined by our outer appearance. 

My body image used to affect me when I was in high school. Not only my weight, but my overall appearance, right down to my hair, teeth, and even the clothes I wore. Everything about myself bothered me, I wasn't comfortable in my own skin. I couldn't fake it, but I tried to change who I was. I tried to smile less, because I didn't like my teeth. I tried to exercise by playing tennis to loose weight, and I even tried to change my friend group in hopes that somehow I would feel prettier. 

Needless to say, it never worked. But, I am comfortable with who I am today. It began at the end of grade 11, during the summer. I began to serve God - I served God in a way I never had before, I served him without holding back; selflessly. In serving God and learning selflessness, God taught me my self worth. I remember looking back on that experience and telling my friends how I used to be self conscious with how I looked, but because of God I could now see how God had made me beautiful.  

It was that realization that God had created me to be beautiful, that really made me believe it. Because God created me there is no way I could be anything but beautiful! We are all created by God, who knows each of us inside and out. He loves us despite our faults and failures, and he gives us an amazing opportunity to enjoy life with him.

Genesis 1:27 says "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them." The image of God is holy, beautiful, perfect and awe inspiring! We are made like God, and we can achieve amazing things when we trust in him!

I know that for some people, body image will always be a struggle, but just know that God created you to be a wonderful, smart, amazing, and beautiful human being! Its amazing to know that God created us in his image - a perfect, awe inspiring God would create beings that resemble his likeness. It think its pretty amazing!

What I'm really trying to say is this, body image isn't important. What is important, is what you do with that body. How you use it as an instrument, how you use it to work hard, how you use your body to love the people around you. That's what makes a difference. And as you love God, you'll learn to love the person he's created you to be.

God bless! :)

Encouragement

Sometimes I can be too critical of myself and the things I do. I can look back at a moment and remember stumbling through something important and I feel the embarrassment all over again. Maybe it's just me, maybe its you too. I guess we all can be overcritical of the things we say, and the things we do, possibly the things we didn't do, didn't say. 

But one thing I do know, that God doesn't want us to be discouraged, he wants us to be encouraged! I don't think I encourage people as much as I should, but I know that when I am encouraged it builds me up, makes me stronger, it makes me believe in the things that I do and why I do them. Today someone made the comment to me "I wish I was doing as much as you do, when I was 20". I was a little surprised by the comment because in my mind I'm not doing enough. Sometimes I can't fulfil my expectations of myself. I want to do more with my life, be more adventurous, love Jesus and love people just a little bit more. 

So, I want to encourage you, whoever is reading this. You may never feel like you're doing enough good in this world, you may be discouraged, and people won't always encourage you. But I do know one thing, that when you follow God's will for your life, you are doing enough.

You are doing enough. You are enough. 

Sometimes I sit down and pray, or even think about the great things I'd like to do one day. They seem near but not near enough, my thoughts can be impatient. But God knows the perfect timing for each event to occur in our lives. Maybe its not today, maybe its not tomorrow, but God will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4). Sometimes following God's will for your life is waiting. In waiting he's preparing you - preparing you for what he will have you do in the future. 

This is something I've been struggling with. I want to do more than I am already doing because I don't see the results of my hard work. I've been discouraged. But now I have been encouraged! Your hard work will pay off, God promises his reward to those who are faithful to him (Colossians 3:23-24). 

God has also taught me something else. That in order for him to use my abilities, my skills, and even my passions, I must be reading his word - the Bible. Spending time with him. It's the Christian's instruction manual to living a God-praising life, a fulfilling life. This relates to the topic of encouragement so well. See, I was discouraged because I was not seeing the results of my hard work, and because I was not feeling strong and confident in what I was doing. And because I wasn't reading my Bible regularly (due to busyness), I wasn't being strengthened like I should have, which led me to believe my hard work for God was going nowhere. 

But now, I do read my Bible. Not always on a regular basis, but I'm working on it with God. And as a result of it, I am far more encouraged in all that I do. I believe that when I do things for God's glory, people can see that, they can tell, but I believe that they can also tell when I'm running on empty. I can't run on empty when it comes to serving God and spending time reading my Bible. Like I car can't go far with little gas, I can't go far with little time spent with God.

I think my point comes down to this quote I heard recently "spending time with God puts everything else into perspective". I have seen this to be true in my life. So, if your life isn't working out for you, if it isn't fulfilling - open up God's word, it will offer you so much more encouragement than the words of anyone else you hear. 

And thank you to the person who encouraged me today - it was much needed and much appreciated! :) 

God bless! 

Discouraged?

Recently I've been discouraged. I would say it's gone on for approximately the past few months. Sure, we all get discouraged, but I've been discouraged about a few things combined together that just led to more discouragement. Some of these things were parts of my life I couldn't control, yet others were things I could. One thing I do know is that Jesus is always there for me and I should never ignore him. But I did. I set aside Jesus, and I hardly read my Bible, and seldom prayed for more than my food. I somehow convinced myself that reading my Bible wouldn't help my discouragement even though I knew deep down that wasn't true.

To be honest, I'm not really sure why all these factors were bothering me the way they were. In my heart I knew that God wanted me to read the Bible through this rough patch, but I chose to ignore that. All I know is that God is the one who I need for any situation. He is the one who can give me strength when I feel weak, build me up when I am knocked down, and encourage me when I am feeling discouraged. Sometimes when we feel that the factors around us are too strong for us to handle, we cave, we give in. We give in to feelings of doubt, denial and we believe these lies. Lies that we allow ourselves to believe because we have no answers, so we give ourselves to pity - I did that. 

I know that Jesus Christ has been my answer to every problem I've come across before. But I'm stubborn sometimes, I know that. I often look to myself for the answers that I know only God can give me. I admit that. And here is when the change begins. When we fail ourselves and we truly have no one left to go to then God is still waiting. He always has been and he always will be waiting for your call.

So, a couple weeks ago I began calling to God for help. I knew that my discouragement had gone too far. I knew that I hadn't read my Bible in what seemed like forever. So I asked God for strength, that he would begin to encourage me once again as I began to read the Bible, his word. God knows how to ease burdens like no one else can. Once you lean on him, you won't find anyone better.

Since I began seeking God's guidance once again, I feel more peace and fulfilment in place of my helpless discouragement. I know that things don't always go my way, but no matter what I've got a God that will stand by me through rain or storm, even in the good times, God stands by me. He stands by us all. I began praying again too. It felt refreshing - prayer and God's word go beautifully together. I cannot pray unless I've read God's word, and I cannot read God's word without prayer. 

So, no matter what life throws my way or yours, I want to encourage you. If you already believe in Jesus Christ, lean on him no matter what, he will be your strength! If you are doubting God right now, open the Bible and take a read. God's word speaks truth to those who read it. Recently I've been reading James and 1 & 2 Thessalonians. And I highly recommend taking a look at James chapter 1 and 2 as well as all of 1 & 2 Thessalonians. 

Romans 12:12 says "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." This verse sums up what I'm trying to say through this post. God is my comforter and he will be yours too, if you trust in him. 

God bless! 

Faith > Sight

I read 2 Corinthians 5:7 today, "for we walk by faith, not by sight" and it occurred to me that I had never really understood what it meant until now. I had never given this verse much thought but I'd always brushed it off as something that I figured I already understood. Walking by faith and not by sight' is so much more than just looking to God when things are going wrong, or asking God for some guidance here and there. Faith is often defined in the Bible as something that means obedient trust, or it can mean belief. In Hebrew the word used for faith is translated to meaning 'trust' - as in trusting God's promises.

It occurred to me tonight that walking by faith is has so much more to do with trust than I had realized. Walking by sight is trusting what you see to be true, but walking by faith is trusting God to determine if what you see is really true. So many of us don't practice walking by faith often enough, including myself. 

When you think about it faith it often comes with close relationships - relationships with friends, relationships with family, and relationships with other people that you are close with. We trust the people that we spend time with generally, and its the same with God. He wants us to have faith in Him and the only way that we can have faith in Him is through a relationship with him. The kind of relationship where you talk to Him and spend time with Him on a daily basis. If you never spent time with your close friend, would you trust them? Probably not. 

Trusting in faith is so much better than trusting in what you can see. How many times have you read something wrong? I know I have many times. Our eyes can often see things wrong, but God can help us see clearly. Faith in God clears our thoughts, He will help us understand things which we cannot comprehend. He can teach us so much more than we could ever know without Him. Faith in God is what will sustain you - it will be your anchor when life gets tough, literally holding your down in rough storms. Faith is knowing that God has a perfect plan, that he has worked everything out for your good in the end. 

I know for sure that God wants your heart - a heart that is devoted to his love. If you have a little faith and trust in Him, He will multiply that faith. I know from personal experience that God has never failed me when I put a little faith in Him - he has always used my faith to show me amazing things that give me even more reason to put my faith in Him. You can but your faith in knowledge, in beauty, even in friends, but no one will ever show you how to see - really see - why things happen in the ways that they do. But God can. 

Hebrews 12:2 says "We must focus on Jesus, the source and goal of our faith. He saw the joy ahead of him, so he endured death on the cross and ignored the disgrace it brought him. Then he received the highest position in heaven, the one next to the throne of God." This verse is an example of the type of faith that God wants to give us - a faith that sees the joy beyond the pain. Our eyes may see pain, but our faith will show us that there's something better beyond that. 

God bless! 

It's about Him

Tonight I opened my Bible (this particular time I was reading the Message) to Matthew 6 and I read verses 19-34. The section is titled "A Life of God-Worship".

Sometimes I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere, and I can get discouraged; when I think like this I'm missing the point - it's not about me, its about Him! I've been discouraged lately, it's been a lot of things really, but we all have our times when we feel like this. Sometimes I just sit there, feeling pity for myself, my situation, moping in my discouragement. But that's not what God wants us to do when we feel discouraged! He wants us to rely on Him, to look to Him for our satisfaction, our meaning, our encouragement. 

Matthew 6:19-34 talks about looking to God at all times, because he cares for us, if we look around to the things that take us away from spending time with God, we get distracted. We can easily forget how much God cares for us. When you focus on God, it allows you to truly forget the things that are bothering you. It's like getting a lollipop in exchange for $1, before you bought the lollipop you were burning with the desire to spend it on anything, but now that you have it, you are completely satisfied and you are enjoying that treat without a care in the world. God is like that, he wants us to enjoy him and to focus on him. Matthew 6:34 says "Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes." I really like the way this verse is worded in the Message, it really speaks to how I'm feeling right now. This verse reminds me that God's got everything in control, my life may feel in limbo, but I know that God's got some good stuff planned for me real soon. 

I've also learned that doing what God asks you isn't always easy, or fun. But its about serving God with to the best of your ability. Serving God is about giving up your time, making a sacrifice to do what God is asking you. But when you follow God, and look toward him you will be blessed - and maybe you'll need some extra encouragement, but God's got that waiting for you in the Bible. 

Sometimes life leaves me feeling down, but I know that as long as I am following God, I know that I am, where God wants me. I may not enjoy the confusion or discouragement, but in this time I can only look to God who will give me the guidance I am looking for. I look to Him through his word, I open my Bible and read; and God never fails to speak to me. 

It's not about what I'm doing, its about what God's doing. God bless!

Pinterest Free

Lent is the time of year when some Christians choose to give something up for the 40 weekdays leading up to Easter. We do this in preparation for Easter, but also to commemorate how Christ fasted 40 days in the desert. This is first year giving something up for Lent. Normally I never gave something up for 40 days because I didn't think I had anything to give up. But this year its a tough one. I'm giving up Pinterest. 

So maybe it sounds like no big deal - at least I thought so. I figured it was no big deal - I'm not addicted to Pinterest, right? Wrong. It hasn't even been a week and I have been fighting the urge to go on Pinterest ever since Wednesday. Its tough giving up something that takes over your life. But that's exactly the problem - its taking over my life, getting in the way of my studies; its distracting me. I never realized how much I would be fighting the temptation, but I am.

I am doing this to remember Christ's struggles as he fasted for 40 days. Just because he was God's son, doesn't mean he didn't feel hunger, nor does it mean he contemplated quitting. The Bible says that he was human in every way (Hebrews 4:15). If Jesus could do it, then so can I. But why am I doing this? Because God has called me to. I asked God what I should take away and he showed me that Pinterest was getting in my way on a daily basis. But I know that I am not doing this alone - he is walking with me every step of the way. Deuteronomy 5:33a says 'You shall walk in all the way that the Lord has commanded you.' This is what I aim to do in the next 35 weekdays. I know that the Lord is there to give me strength (Isaiah 41:10), he is there to encourage me (Philippians 4:13), and he will teach me to walk in his truth (Psalm 27:11).

I am excited to see how God will use this experience to teach me something in my life; because he has brought me to it, he will bring me through it. God is stronger than my temptations. Join me in my journey as I have faith and trust in God! 

Praise God from whom all blessings flow! 

Peace in God

John 14:27 says "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."

This is a verse that I came across tonight as I was talking to a friend about something that was concerning me. If we trust God, he promises us peace so we don't have to worry about the things that concern us. I can be quite the worrier when it comes to certain situations – and worry can leave me feeling sick. Yet, the more I get to know God, the more I read my Bible, the more time I spend in prayer, the less worry I feel. God is the only one who can give you true peace – a peaceful life that will leave you with greater happiness. 

I know what it's like not to have peace when you go to bed at night. Here's the scenario: You lie down in bed at night thinking about your day and you can't sleep, something doesn't feel right, you question all your actions that you did throughout the day, and somehow you wish you didn't live out today in the way you did, but you just had fun right? Why don't you feel satisfied at the end of the day when you go to bed? Nothing went wrong, nothing messed up. But at night you feel sick with your day; you lack peace in your life. That is what I used to feel like, I'd go to bed and I didn't want to look back at my day - something about it didn't feel right, I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin at the end of the day. 

There was a time in my life when I didn't feel like this, but at times it came and went. I remember thinking about why I felt this way, and I knew the answer but I didn't want to admit it to myself. Things had changed that year in school for me, I was extremely self-conscious - so maybe that's why I was feeling unsatisfied? But no. Something in my life was not giving me peace.  

I realized that summer what I had been missing. It was God. That year had been a rough one for me, I did things I had never done before, and yet I had fun with some new found friends - what could be wrong in that? In the process of having fun and trying new things, I forgot about God. I left him behind thinking that I could enjoy myself without having to worry about feeling bad about my foolish decisions and my declining grades. But the fact was that my soul missed God, my soul was what needed Him in my life. So that summer at camp, I found that complete peace in God I hadn't realized I was missing. The saying is true 'you don't know what you've got 'till it's gone' - I had forgotten that I used to go to bed feeling calm, not sick with worry or displeased with my life.

I now know that God is the only one who can give me complete peace. Ever since that point where I began trusting God once again, I have never felt the same way. I look forward to new things knowing that God is helping me through each day. I asked for peace, and God gave it to me. I still worry, but I pray too - and in that God answers my prayers, I know he will never leave me, so I don't have to be troubled, nor do I have to fear anything. 

The cool thing is that God wants us to have his peace! He wants us to be fulfilled with our lives, not to worry about the little things, but to be able to lie down at night and sleep peacefully. John 14:27 is a wonderful reminder of the peace God gives each and every one of us to asks him. 

Let the peace of Christ rule in your heart (Colossians 3:15) God bless! 

Worship

Early last week, Psalm 63 came to mind, and I don't know why, but when I read it early Sunday morning on my way to church, verse 3 stood out to me. Psalm 63:3 says "Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you". I thought this verse was pretty neat, especially as I was going to be leading worship at church that morning. 

But what is worship? Singing on a Sunday morning at church? Praying before a meal? Worship is a way of living, how we (as Christians) live each day. In Greek (the language of the New Testament) worship is 'λατρεία' meaning devotion or adoration. So worship is not just an act of singing to God on Sunday mornings at church, but it is the way in which we choose to live our life. I do my best to live everyday in worship of God - I want to adore God and I am devoted to him. Saying 'I adore and I am devoted to God' sounds so much more beautiful than 'I worship God'. There is something beautiful about living one's life for a God, a deity that we've never met nor seen. 

So maybe it sounds weird to say I worship God, by loving, adoring, and staying devoted to him. But do you know why I've chosen this way of life? Because God has done so much more for me than I could have ever imagined, when I was sad he gave me pure unending joy, when I felt rejected he loved me, and when I was lost he found me. God is so much more to me than only that guy we pray to at church, or before meals. God is real to me, I can feel he is with me, I can experience the love and joy he gives me. 

I want to tell a short story. In high school I got in with the wrong group of friends, and because of them I changed the way I acted - I swore, I talked like them, and I even began to act like them. Little did I know that I was hurting myself by acting like this. Before I knew it, I was unhappy, feeling dissatisfied with life, and I got angry easily. I didn't care about school any more, and that year my grades dropped. I was messing around, living in the moment, carefree. Then that summer, when the school year was out, I went on a trip to M'Chigeeng to serve the wonderful people on the First Nations Reserve on behalf of an organization called DayStar. I went with my church, and in that community, we ran a day camp. We taught the kids about God, told them how much he loved them, and for once in a very long time I began to realize how much God loved me. If I could love these beautiful children, and if love comes from God, then God must have a much bigger heart for me than I could ever imagine. I can't remember the exact time, day, or moment, but some point on that reserve I came to love and adore God. I came back from that trip feeling like I had better vision, physically I could see better. I could see better colours, better light, somehow my eyes felt opened wide and I felt happiness that would never leave me - joy. It was completely wonderful, in serving others and forgetting about myself, God answered a silent prayer, a desperate plea, he took away my unhappiness, he gave me satisfaction, he took away my anger, even the swearing stopped. This was how I came to know God's love for me, through the love I saw in these beautiful children. I didn't realize how much I needed God's love until he gave it to me. God is love. I know that God is love because 2000 years ago, he came to earth in the form of a man, and died for my life, knowing that I would make mistakes. But he chose to love me enough to make me his daughter. Because he died for me, I can always come to him and talk to him as my Father, he is a wonderful father who hears my prayers and answers the whispers of my hurting heart. He didn't just die for me - he died for every single person, and anyone who accepts him can have a loving relationship with him, just ask.

See why I worship my God? Because if he died for me, the least I could give him in return is my devotion, my time. I live my life as an act of worship so people can look at me and see that God has given me joy and a wonderful life to live. I live to tell people my story, to inspire those who feel like their life isn't perfect. My God is perfect, but my life isn't and that's why I need him. He took my darkness (hurt, sadness, and anger) and replaced it with light (joy, happiness, and a smile).

Here's a poem I wrote a little more than a year ago called The Cards are not Mine:

So many things,

Dragging me down.

Everything I did,

... Everywhere I went.

Memories.

Pain.

Rejection.

Are no more.

I found peace outside,

Behind old doors.

Locked,

They were no longer.

Soon came healing,

From another source.

I gave my life away,

Traded for another.

Love came in,

Replacing old feelings.

Joy.

Understanding.

A new beginning,

With a different ending.

Would I trade again?

No.

The cards are not mine

To keep or deal.

God bless! 

Trust in Him

I must confess, I do not always trust God. I often rely on myself, others, or family for my answers to life's probing questions. Yet, as I look back at this week, God has shown me through at least two separate instances that I need to learn to trust him more.

The first instance was through reading Psalm 91. I began my week by reading Psalm 91, and all week it kept on coming to mind, then today as I re-looked at that specific Psalm, its a Psalm all about trusting God. Psalm 91 gives reasons to; God because he has saved many from their perils in the past, in 91:10 it says "no evil shall be allowed to befall you, no plague come near your tent", referring to saving the Israelites from the plagues in Exodus. This Psalm also talks about how God will be a defence in times of trouble, a deity that we can return to when life gets rough - Psalm 91:1-2 "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, "My refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust". 

The second instance occurred through a song called Oceans by Hillsong United.  It's a beautiful song that I've been listening to off and on all week. It talks about how God has called each and every one of us to be His. One line in particular says, "Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you will call me.Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander, and my faith will be made stronger, in the presence of my Saviour". This song is all about trusting God and letting him lead you through rough and stormy waters. Though circumstances may completely drag you down, God will always be there to lead you out of the stormy waters, and you will never sink when he is the one you put your trust in. 

It's funny how God can use two separate things during my week to show me that my trust in Him was lacking, and He was so specific as to point out a situation that had been on my mind all week. He showed me that my friendship with this particular person was in his hands, that I should stop worrying over it, that the questioning was to be left up to him. Trusting his good plan for my life is the best thing for me to do right now, because by worrying I know I will get no farther than I was yesterday. No amount of googling, questioning, or wondering will change anything about my current situation - but God can. 

Trust isn't an easy thing, and I know that, especially when a situation seems uncertain or we are used to being let down. But I know for sure that when we trust God to take care of a situation, he always pulls through, he keeps his promises and never lets us down. Psalm 37:5 says "Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act", this is as much of a command as it is a promise. God promises that when we give him our burdens, our troubles, and our worries, that he will take them, and secure him with his promise that he will never leave us or forsake us, nor will he leave us fighting on our own. 

I will leave you with Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight". I highly recommend you take a look at Oceans by Hillsong United - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy9nwe9_xzw . God bless!

My Story

Hello, my name is Hannah. I am currently in University and recently I've decided to start this blog. I plan on updating roughly once a week (probably Sunday) or whenever I feel the need to speak what's on my mind.

I've called my blog Passion for the King because I think it best describes who I am. I am a lover of my King, and I desire to share my passion with those around me. I can't lie, God is a big part of my life and I desire to live for Him. 

To begin I might as well start with a little bit about myself and who I am. Like I said, my name is Hannah and I'm in my second year of University. I was raised by two wonderful parents who cared for me and wanted the best for me. I began attending church at the age of 5 and its been a part of my life ever since. I guess you could say I grew up in the church, I acted in the church plays, I participated in Bible memorizing, I did it all. With every week of church I began to grow a deep love for God, and at the age of 8 I decided that I wanted to live the rest of my life for Jesus. I knew that I had made the right choice, God had chosen me and I chose to follow him. At the age of 10 I publicly declared my love for Him in front of my church as I was baptised, acknowledging that I had chosen to live in a way that pleased God. After that point, I knew I had changed, I became more compassionate, but shortly after, I started getting bullied, it affected me, it was painful feeling rejected by my school friends. As a result, I was afraid to share my opinions in class, and just as pre-teenhood approached me, I became very quiet at school.

Yet, through all this, I always felt comfortable in my church, going to church every week kept me strong and I knew that I could always come back to my church if the bullying got worse. I was shy in school, but at home and church I could be outgoing, it was more comfortable for me. Church was somewhere I felt loved: loved by my parents, loved by my friends, but more importantly, loved by God. As I entered high school, things were different, the bullying stopped, yet I still was reserved and shy in large group settings. Grade 10 was no different, but grade 11 was when I decided that I wanted to change things. I was hurt from my past bullying, and I was slowly becoming more self conscious about my self image. In grade 11, I decided that I was going to have different friends, I wanted to fit in like I never had. I changed my friend group, I hung out with some kids I deemed 'cooler' than my old friends. We swore together, we made fun of others, and we had fun; we did things that made us feel good. We were all hurting in different ways. As a result of these friends, I put school, family, and church as second priorities. Enjoying ourselves was more important than school, family, or for me, taking a moment to spend time with God.

Before I entered grade 12, I applied for a trip to work with an organization called Day Star. It was a trip that a church was leading; it involved working on a First Nations Ojibwa reserve called M'Chigeeng, to run a free summer camp. I applied and I was accepted, and that summer was one of the best summers of my life. I went there to serve the people, and in turn God changed my heart. I began to focus on God once again and I knew that God wanted me to return to him, that the life I had chosen to live that past year or so was not good for me. God taught me to love others, and he gave me a self confidence I never had. In 10 days, I grew a deep love for my God, who I knew had chosen me that summer to show love to a beautiful community of people. I came back with a joy that only God could give me, and an appreciation for my parents care for me while I was growing up. I went into grade 12 that Fall, and my friends saw the change in me, I was happier, and it was evident in all that I did. I expressed to my old friends the love I had for Jesus and my newly made friends didn't want anything to do with me any more. It didn't bother me, I had my old friends back and I began to tell all those who were close to me about how God had changed my life just that past summer. I went into grade 12 with a clear mind, I devoted much of my time to my work and I started a Bible study with a couple friends that we geared towards students at school who were labelled as "Special-Ed". God used that time to teach me what it was like to serve him, in school and outside of school. That year, I got accepted to the Christian University of my choice, and that's the school I attend now. Every year I return back to the lovely community of M'Chigeeng and I love working at Day Star day camp! Every year I go to serve the people, and God surprises me by changing my heart in a different way every time! I have fallen in love with the people of M'Chigeeng and I've fallen in love with God all over again.

I am a girl who believes that an extraordinary God can do wonderful things. I am a living testimony of the love of God; when I was lost He came up to me, said my past was in his hands, and that he wanted to give me a new life. I fell in love with my Creator, and each day I love him a little bit more. Since grade 12, I have come to understand that God loved me so much that he died for the wrong I would do in the future, he gave up his life so that I could choose whether or not I wanted to love him! God has given me a passion for telling others about how he changed my life, and now I love speaking about him. I can't boast in my strengths, nor in my weaknesses, because I know that God has given me each to teach me lessons in this life. 

I have called this blog Passion for the King because I want to show people how much my God loves each and every one of us. I am honest, I will share my struggles and joys. I believe that God will use this blog for his purposes.

"My heart will praise the Lord for He has done great things." Psalm 111:1-2